2026 season · Week 7 recap / Week 8 preview · Final scores checked October 28
Ditka leads the league again at 121.10. C-Kupps finishes second with 110.40. KVWN squeezes past Globo by 4.05, while Roboto wins with two zeros because Puppet somehow found an even lower gear.
The Week 7 median is 100.48 (100.475 before rounding). Love Shack beats it and loses; Lady Luck and Roboto miss it and win. Fantasy football remains an excellent way to turn arithmetic into a personal grievance.
Lady Luck wins by 9.25 while scoring below the median. Bucky Irving posts 23.50 and the RB group supplies 44.60. M.J. gets 21.80 from Barkley and Walker combined; all three starting WRs together reach 23.90.
Lady Luck wins a game that should have come with a receipt and a return policy.
Pollard erupts for 35.00, overcoming a 7.65 from Mahomes and zeros at flex and defense. Puppet’s Wilson and Coker combine for 5.00; Henry adds 5.40. Amon-Ra’s 19.70 is a distress flare, not a rescue.
Puppet loses by 18.85 to a team with two empty scoring slots. The strings have become a tripping hazard.
Ditka takes the weekly scoring crown again: Burrow 31.80, Smith-Njigba 26.80, Loveland 16.40. Santa gets 22.10 from McBride and 40.20 from the RB group, but takes a second straight loss despite finishing third in scoring.
Santa finally has a legitimate bad-luck complaint. Please form an orderly queue behind everyone who endured the 5–0 victory tour.
Dearborn wins by 9.15 behind Geno’s 26.35, London’s 16.10, and Gordon’s 16.80. Ralph gets 23.70 from Flowers and 20.00 from Stevenson, but Aaron Jones supplies 3.10. Dearborn survives 1.20 at TE.
Ralph is 1–6. At this point the wrecking is less a team identity and more a municipal inspection finding.
Judkins, Allen, and Emanuel Wilson combine for 57.30; Lamb adds 21.90. Love gets 25.40 from Dak and 23.60 from Jameson Williams, but a zero from Jeremiyah Love leaves the Shack short by 9.50.
C-Kupps discovers the running game. Love Shack discovers that a missing starter is only funny when you win.
The closest game of the week goes to KVWN by 4.05. Higgins scores 23.80, Javonte 21.50, and McCaffrey 19.00. Maye’s 30.65 and Corum’s 16.60 keep Globo close; Likely contributes 2.20 after last week’s 20.90.
The gym lost to a television station. Membership cancellations will be processed after the broadcast.
Verified ESPN pairings, current records, and Week 7 receipts.
4–3 meets 3–4. Lady Luck just won with 93.80; Globo lost with 100.05. The schedule has already picked a side in the psychological warfare. Bucky’s 23.50 and Maye’s 30.65 were last week’s lifelines; both managers would appreciate their other positions joining the league.
5–2 meets 4–3. KVWN has won three straight. Love just lost despite clearing the median, with a zero at RB. The broadcast booth is feeling invincible; the Shack should start by making sure all the chairs contain football players.
2–5 meets 1–6. C-Kupps just scored 110.40; Ralph managed 92.20. A basement matchup with enough RB points on one side and enough emotional damage on the other to qualify as mixed-use housing.
3–4 meets 5–2. Santa has lost two straight, including a respectable 108.75 last week. Dearborn scraped past Ralph at 101.35. McBride supplied 22.10 while Dearborn’s TE supplied 1.20; that position battle currently resembles a forklift racing a shopping cart.
3–4 meets 5–2. Ditka scored 252.45 over the last two weeks; Puppet scored 156.50. Their records are wearing each other’s clothes. Puppet needs a response from more than Amon-Ra before this becomes another weather-related insurance claim.
3–4 meets 4–3. Last week’s scores: 84.55 and 87.55. Roboto won thanks to Pollard’s 35.00; M.J. needs Walker and the receivers to rebound. This could be a bounce-back game, or two managers taking turns checking whether ESPN is broken.
Cumulative all-play wins; total points break ties. Movement compares the same method after Week 6.
| Rank / Team | Move | Record | All-play | Weekly verdict |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1. Dearborn Dirkas | — | 3-4 | 54–23 | 101.35 and back in the win column. Geno supplied 26.35. Tight end supplied 1.20, which is technically participation. |
| 2. KVWN San Diego | — | 5-2 | 53–24 | 104.10 and a third straight win. Beat Globo by 4.05; the broadcast booth has officially switched to smug mode. |
| 3. Santas Naughty Elfs | ↑ 1 | 5-2 | 46–31 | 108.75 and a second straight loss. Santa’s 5–0 start has turned into a very tense conversation with the elves. |
| 4. Hurricane Ditka | ↑ 4 | 3-4 | 45–32 | Back-to-back weekly scoring crowns. Burrow and JSN combined for 58.60. The hurricane warning is now legally actionable. |
| 5. The Love Shack | ↑ 1 | 4-3 | 42–35 | 100.90 and a loss despite beating the median. Starting a zero at RB is a bold interior-design choice for a shack with structural issues. |
| 6. Lady Luck's Leprechauns | ↓ 1 | 4-3 | 41–36 | 93.80 and a win. Bucky brought 23.50; the starting wideouts brought 10.20 combined and an impressive commitment to spectator sports. |
| 7. Puppet Master | ↓ 4 | 5-2 | 39–38 | 68.70. At 5–2, the record still looks expensive. The roster just bounced a check at Dollar Tree. |
| 8. Team M.J. | ↓ 1 | 3-4 | 37–40 | 84.55. Last week’s heroes clocked out early. The group project has become an email chain titled ‘just following up.’ |
| 9. C-Kupps | ↑ 3 | 2-5 | 30–47 | 110.40, second this week. The RB room produced 57.30. Someone finally explained that the objective is to accumulate points. |
| 10. Globo Gym | ↓ 1 | 3-4 | 28–49 | 100.05 and a 4.05-point loss. Maye scored 30.65; Likely scored 2.20. The gym has cardio and absolutely no core. |
| 11. Mr. Roboto | ↓ 1 | 4-3 | 24–53 | 87.55 and a win with zeros from flex and defense. Tony Pollard scored 35 and should demand custody of the franchise. |
| 12. Wreck It Ralphs | ↓ 1 | 1-6 | 23–54 | 92.20 and 1–6. Flowers and Stevenson supplied 43.70. The rest of the roster is apparently being paid in exposure. |
Ordered by wins, then total points for display.
| Team | Record | Points / week | Median record | All-play | Avg. vs median |
|---|