Archive edition / Week 4 recap + Week 5 preview

Puppet posts 66.90. Somebody check the strings.

Santa stays unbeaten. Puppet scores 66.90. Ditka answers with 76.45. Incredible stuff.

The weekly damage

KVWN San Diego led the league with 123.50. The league median was 112.62. Below that line, the excuses begin.

Week 4 scoreboard

Away	Score	Home	Score
Lady Luck's Leprechauns	116.25	C-Kupps	100.95
Dearborn Dirkas	121.15	KVWN San Diego	123.50
Hurricane Ditka	76.45	Globo Gym	94.00
Mr. Roboto	114.15	The Love Shack	116.60
Team M.J.	117.55	Wreck It Ralphs	111.10
Puppet Master	66.90	Santas Naughty Elfs	99.65

On deck: Week 5 matchup previews

Archive preview: written now using only scores through Week 4. Scoring averages are shown for context; the trash talk is new.

Matchup 01

Lady Luck's Leprechauns vs. Puppet Master

Scoring averages entering matchup: 113.11–103.55

Lady Luck scored 116.25 last week; Puppet scored 66.90. One of these is a football result. The other is a Wi-Fi password.

Matchup 02

Santas Naughty Elfs vs. Team M.J.

Scoring averages entering matchup: 120.69–107.45

Santa is 4–0. M.J. just scored 117.55. This is the part where everyone says ‘someone has to beat Santa eventually’ and volunteers somebody else.

Matchup 03

Wreck It Ralphs vs. Mr. Roboto

Scoring averages entering matchup: 96.85–101.84

Ralph is still winless. Roboto lost by 2.45. Both have scheduled a meeting with the concept of bullshit.

Matchup 04

The Love Shack vs. Hurricane Ditka

Scoring averages entering matchup: 104.96–100.55

The Love Shack is coming off 116.60; Ditka just scored 76.45. The Shack is open for business and the hurricane appears to be a ceiling fan.

Matchup 05

Globo Gym vs. Dearborn Dirkas

Scoring averages entering matchup: 83.01–116.84

Dearborn lost by 2.35 with 121.15 points. Globo has not hit 95 all season. What could possibly go wrong? Please do not answer that question.

Matchup 06

C-Kupps vs. KVWN San Diego

Scoring averages entering matchup: 93.84–113.60

C-Kupps is 0–4 and KVWN just beat Dearborn by 2.35. The standings say one thing; the group chat says twelve things and none of them are helpful.

Power rankings after Week 4

Cumulative all-play wins through this week; total points break ties. No future scores used.

Rank / team	All-play	Average points
1. Dearborn Dirkas	36–8	116.84
2. KVWN San Diego	32–12	113.60
3. Lady Luck's Leprechauns	29–15	113.11
4. Santas Naughty Elfs	27–17	120.69
5. Team M.J.	27–17	107.45
6. Puppet Master	25–19	103.55
7. The Love Shack	22–22	104.96
8. Hurricane Ditka	22–22	100.55
9. Mr. Roboto	18–26	101.84
10. C-Kupps	12–32	93.84
11. Wreck It Ralphs	11–33	96.85
12. Globo Gym	3–41	83.01

Weekly scores vs. the median

Dashed marker: league median. Bar scale: 0–180 points.

KVWN San Diego

123.50

Dearborn Dirkas

121.15

Team M.J.

117.55

The Love Shack

116.60

Lady Luck's Leprechauns

116.25

Mr. Roboto

114.15

Wreck It Ralphs

111.10

C-Kupps

100.95

Santas Naughty Elfs

99.65

Globo Gym

94.00

Hurricane Ditka

76.45

Puppet Master

66.90

Starter points by position

Team	QB	RB	WR	TE	K	D/ST
Lady Luck's Leprechauns	14.45	43.40	28.80	17.60	7.00	5.00
Dearborn Dirkas	21.05	18.40	54.50	10.20	5.00	12.00
Hurricane Ditka	24.75	22.00	17.70	0.00	9.00	3.00
C-Kupps	13.95	40.60	32.80	6.60	5.00	2.00
Mr. Roboto	19.25	44.50	25.40	15.00	5.00	5.00
KVWN San Diego	18.80	43.30	46.20	1.20	10.00	4.00
Team M.J.	26.55	31.90	30.60	13.50	9.00	6.00
Globo Gym	15.00	28.90	34.60	2.50	8.00	5.00
Puppet Master	5.80	23.10	19.90	5.10	11.00	2.00
The Love Shack	21.10	28.20	31.90	18.40	11.00	6.00
Santas Naughty Elfs	12.85	47.40	23.80	6.60	5.00	4.00
Wreck It Ralphs	21.80	44.00	24.10	11.20	5.00	5.00

League standings after Week 4

Wins first, total points for display ties.

Team	Record	Points for
Santas Naughty Elfs	4–0	482.75
KVWN San Diego	3–1	454.40
Lady Luck's Leprechauns	3–1	452.45
Puppet Master	3–1	414.20
Mr. Roboto	3–1	407.35
Dearborn Dirkas	2–2	467.35
Team M.J.	2–2	429.80
The Love Shack	2–2	419.85
Hurricane Ditka	1–3	402.20
Globo Gym	1–3	332.05
Wreck It Ralphs	0–4	387.40
C-Kupps	0–4	375.35